Interview with Rex Tremble

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Comment:  I received an advanced copy of the article "Rex Tremble at the Reading
                    Railroad Heritage Museum." It's awful. That's no place to hookup with
                    women. My other reasons are bound and boxed, and will be delivered by
                    UPS.

GvJ:  We have no strong objections to receiving surly comments about an advanced
          copy of something that has yet to be written. That way we we can get a clue
          as to what we might say, and incorporate the relevant objections.

Comment:  What's with the use of the words "abbreviated foliage" in the interview?

GvJ:  We encourage our reporters to believe they are reaching literary heights and
          allow the occasional rogue, or (in their minds) fanciful wording.

According to the draft GvJ Style Guide, the following words are acceptable substitutes:

• "Agent Oranged"
• "Chernobyled"
• "clear cut"
• "de-sapulated"
• "exfoliated"
• "flatulanded"
• "FUBAR"
• "like totally dead"
• "Napalm B'd"
• "over-pasturized"
• "scorched earth"
• "singed in an inappropriate manner"


• or the ironic antonym
  "Land o Lakes"

Rapture Watch

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Comment:  I was told that Rapture Cream ("Come Up Gleaming") is temporarily                     unavailable. That was 2 months ago; what's the story now?

GvJ:  Imagine our disappointment at the prospect of being side-saddled with semi-vast
         quantities of these tubularized emollients. Fortunately, a contact at the U.S. State
         Department familiar with applying demulcents to the palm, arranged for approval
         of an humanitarian shipment to North Korea (DPRK) for the benefit of the
         "Dear Leader" and his family - possibly out of U.S. concern that cracked skin during
         the forthcoming winter might set off more irritable behavior.

         Now that "yard stick with hair" is gone - the NKs deny he died during a
         Rapture Cream slather party - we expect the balance of the shipment will be
         undeliverable, and again available online in the U.S., or at Rapture Cream parties
         hosted in the tri-state area by GvJ representative Creamy Cheung.¹

         ¹ (Not to be mistaken for one of these Linkedin members.)